NGATI WOCHITA: MFUNDO ZOFUNIKA KUKONZA PA UKWATI WANU WA LGBTQ
Ngati inu kale kukonzekera ukwati wanu mwambo mwina muyenera kulabadira zinthu izi kwambiri. Nawa maupangiri okonzekera kuti mupange mwambo wanu ndendende momwe mukufunira.
Ndi malingaliro apadera otani a momwe okwatirana amafikira mwambo wawo?
Banja lirilonse liri losiyana m'mene amayandikira mwambowu ndipo palibe "njira yolondola" yochitira izo mosasamala kanthu kuti Ukwati wa LGBTQ kapena osati. Mtundu wotchuka kwambiri womwe tawonapo ndi maanja ndikuyenda nthawi imodzi m'mipata yosiyanasiyana ndikumakumana pakati. Mmodzi mwa maanja adasankha kukhala ndi tinjira zitatu; aliyense wa iwo anayenda m’kanjira kake ku mbali zonse za alendo panthaŵi imodzi, anakumana kutsogolo, ndiyeno anayenda m’kanjira kapakati pamodzi pamapeto a mwambo wawo. Banja lina linasankha timipata tiŵiri tomwe aliyense amalowamo nthawi imodzi.
Njira ina yodziwika bwino ndi yakuti okondedwa ayende limodzi, mwinamwake atagwirana manja, pansi pa kanjira. Ngati phwando lawo laukwati likuyendanso pamwambowu, otsogolera amatha kuphatikizidwa ndi wina kumbali iliyonse (mosasamala kanthu za jenda) ndiyeno amagawanika pamene afika kutsogolo kuti ayime kumbali yomwe akuimira. Mabanja ena amasankha kutsata ndondomekoyi pamodzi ndikulowa cham'mbali, pamene ena angasankhe "mwambo" wamwambo wina aliyense akuyenda ndi makolo awo pansi pa kanjira.
Kodi tikuwona chiyani pakukhala pamipando yopanda mwambo?
Kusankha "mbali" pa mwambowu ndi mwambo umene wapita kunja kwambiri kwa maukwati ambiri, mosasamala kanthu kuti ndi amuna kapena akazi okhaokha kapena amuna kapena akazi okhaokha. Kunena zowona, sitingakumbukire nthawi yomaliza yomwe tidapita ku ukwati komwe okwatiranawo adafuna kuti alendo awo azikhala mbali inayake. Izi zikunenedwa, tikuwona maanja akuyamba kupanga mapangidwe awo okhala ndi mwambo. Miyambo yopanda kanjira kapena kukhala "mozungulira" yakhala yotchuka kwambiri kwa okwatirana onse, mosasamala kanthu kuti ndi amuna kapena akazi okhaokha kapena ayi.
Kodi maanja akuyenda bwanji posankha phwando laukwati wawo? Ndi zochitika ziti zomwe zikutuluka kumeneko?
Choyamba, tiyeni tikonze tanthauzo lake. Nthawi zonse timakonda kunena kuti "phwando laukwati" osati "phwando laukwati" mosasamala kanthu kuti pali mkwatibwi muukwati kapena ayi - ndi njira yowonjezera. Mabanja ambiri, mosasamala kanthu kuti ndi amuna kapena akazi okhaokha kapena ayi, akukhala ndi maphwando a ukwati osakanikirana ndi amayi ndi anyamata omwe akuyimirira mbali zonse za mwambowo akusintha kotero kuti "phwando laukwati" limakonda kugwirizana ndi mabanja onse.
Kwa zaka zingapo zapitazi taona mchitidwe kutsamira ku maphwando ang'onoang'ono aukwati, ndi munthu mmodzi kapena awiri mbali iliyonse, njira yonse kusakhala ndi phwando laukwati nkomwe. Pamene maanja asankha kusiya phwando laukwati nthawi zambiri amasankha wina wapadera, monga kholo kapena mchimwene wake, kuti akhale mboni yosayina chiphaso chaukwati mwachinsinsi pambuyo pa mwambowo.
Ndi malingaliro otani osinthana malumbiro kwa maanja?
Tawonapo maanja ali achikhalidwe chambiri ndi malumbiro akale (osinthidwa pang'ono) ndipo amatha kuyimitsa yemwe amakhala woyamba pa malumbiro ndi amene amakhala woyamba mphete. Nthawi zambiri, okwatiranawo amasankha kulemba malumbiro awoawo ndikuzipanga kukhala zaumwini.
Dzina lodziwika bwino limene taliona likugwiritsiridwa ntchito m’malumbiro amwambo ndi lakuti “wokondedwa” m’malo mwa kunena kuti “mwamuna” kapena “mkazi”; koma ndiyenso zimatengera awiriwa komanso maudindo omwe amagwiritsa ntchito paubwenzi wawo.
Kodi zikuyenda bwanji momwe maanja a LGBTQ akuyandikira mawonekedwe oyamba?
Izi zonse zimatengera ubale wawo! Njira yodziwika bwino yomwe tawonapo ndikutembenuka nthawi yomweyo Kuyang'ana Koyamba, m'malo mokhala ndi munthu m'modzi kupita kwa wina. Timakonda iyi chifukwa imawonjezera chinthu chosewerera ndi kutembenuka nthawi imodzi ndipo zomwe zimachitika nthawi zambiri zimapanga chithunzi chabwino!
Tawonanso zambiri "zachikhalidwe" Choyamba Zimayang'ana pomwe munthu m'modzi muubwenzi ali woyenerera kuyimirira ndikudikirira pomwe winayo ali woyenerera kuyenda mu Kuyang'ana Koyamba.
Chikhalidwe china chomwe tikuwona ndichakuti awiriwa akonzekere limodzi osayang'ana koyamba koma angotuluka limodzi ndikuyamba kutenga. zithunzi. Atha kusinthana khadi kapena mphatso nthawi ya chithunzi isanakwane womwe ndi mwayi wabwino kwambiri wanthawi yapamtima komanso wamalingaliro. Zimangotengera zomwe zikugwirizana ndi umunthu wa mnzanuyo!
Kunena zoona, pamene mukukonzekera ukwati mumaganizira za anthu awiriwa, ubale wawo, ndi momwe akufuna kusinthira tsiku lawo; ndi njira yomweyo mosasamala kanthu kuti ndi amuna kapena akazi okhaokha kapena amuna kapena akazi okhaokha. Ambiri mwa maanja akusankha ndikusankha (ngati alipo) miyambo yomwe akufuna kuphatikizira; ndipo chifukwa choti mwamuna ndi mkazi ndi amuna kapena akazi okhaokha sizitanthauza kuti sangakhale “achikhalidwe” mu ukwati
maukwati, tidawona maanja azikhalidwe za LGBTQ komanso akwatibwi omwe si achikhalidwe chawo. Chosangalatsa ndichakuti, mosasamala kanthu za jenda, mutha kupanga chikondwerero chomwe chimawonetsa banjali ndi chikondi chawo!
Siyani Mumakonda