Izifundo ezisi-7 zothando zoMsitho weLGBTQ+

Siyaluthanda olu fundo lucingelwayo, lushukumayo nolunothando lwe-LGBTQ+ imisitho yomtshato.

nguBrittny Drye

Ukufunda kunokungenisa ubuntu kunye nothando kumsitho kodwa, kuyavunywa ukuba, kunokuba nzima ukufumana ababhali abasebenzisa imibongo ngendlela engathathi cala ngokwesini. Sitsale ufundo olusixhenxe olufanele umsitho kwimibongo yethu esiyintandokazi, iincwadi zabantwana kunye nezigqibo zenkundla, ezibhiyozela uthando, zinika uhoyi kuluntu lweLGBTQ+ kwaye zibonakalisa izibini ezitshatileyo kuwo wonke.

1. NgoJuni 26, 2015, iNkundla ePhakamileyo yase-US u-Anthony Kennedy wafunda uluvo oluninzi olwaguqula ubomi bezigidi zabantu baseMelika, ezisa. ukulingana emtshatweni kwilizwe lonke. Oku kwakungeyombali nje kuphela, kodwa yayiyimbongo ethe ngqo.

“Alukho umanyano olunzulu njengomtshato, kuba luquka eyona milinganiselo iphakamileyo yothando, ukuthembeka, ukuzinikela, ukuzincama nentsapho. Ekwakheni umanyano lomtshato, abantu ababini baba yinto enkulu kunangaphambili. Njengoko abanye babaceli kwezi meko bebonisa, umtshato uquka uthando olunokunyamezela kwanaxa sele ufile. Ibingayiqondi kakuhle into yokuba la madoda nabafazi bathi abayihloniphi imbono yomtshato. Isibongozo sabo sesokuba balihloniphe, balihloniphe ngokunzulu kangangokuba bafune ukuzifumanela inzaliseko yalo. Ithemba labo alinakugwetyelwa ukuhlala ubulolo, likhutshelwa ngaphandle kwelinye lawona maziko amadala empucuko. Bacela isidima esilinganayo emehlweni omthetho. UMgaqo-siseko uyabanika elo lungelo.”

-UJustice Anthony Kennedy, Hodges v. Obergefell

2. Kucingelwa ukuba yi-gay okanye i-bisexual, imisebenzi kaWalt ​​Whitman yaphawulwa njengexhokonxa ixesha labo. Kodwa isitanza sokugqibela “kwiNgoma yeNdlela eVulelekileyo” sivuselela uthando olumangalisayo—kwaye yintoni eyona nto ibalulekileyo kunokonwaba emva koko?

“Camerado, ndikunika isandla sam!

Ndikunika uthando lwam ngaphezu kwemali!

Ndininikela ngokwam phambi kokushumayela okanye ngomthetho;

Ungandinika ngokwakho? Ungahamba nam?

Sonamathelana lo gama sisaphila?

-Walt Whitman, ".Ingoma yendlela evulekileyo”

3. Umsebenzi kaMary Oliver uhlanganisa uthando, indalo nemisitho, yaye wakhuthazwa kakhulu xa wayehambahamba kufutshane nekhaya lakhe eliseProvincetown, eMassachusetts, awathi wabelana ngalo neqabane lakhe, uMolly Cook, kangangeminyaka engama-40 de kwasekufeni kukaCook ngowama-2005.

“Xa siqhuba ebumnyameni.

kwindlela ende eya eProvincetown,

xa sidiniwe,

xa izakhiwo kunye nemipayini yokukhuhla ziphulukana nenkangeleko yazo eqhelekileyo,

Ndiba nomfanekiso ngqondweni wethu sinyuka kwimoto ebalekayo.

Ndicinga ukuba sibona yonke into kwenye indawo-

phezulu kwenye yeendunduma eziluthuthu, okanye ubunzulu obungenagama

amasimi olwandle.

Kwaye into esiyibonayo lihlabathi elingenako ukusixabisa,

kodwa into esiyixabisileyo.

Kwaye into esiyibonayo bubomi bethu buhamba ngolo hlobo

emacaleni amnyama ayo yonke into,

izibane ezitshayela ubumnyama,

ukukholelwa kwizinto eziliwaka eziethe-ethe nezingenakungqinwa.

Ujonge usizi,

ukucotha ulonwabo,

ukwenza onke amajiko afanelekileyo

ezantsi ukuya kutsho kwizithintelo zokugquma elwandle,

amaza ajikelezayo,

izitrato ezimxinwa, izindlu,

elidlulileyo, elizayo,

umnyango ongowakhe

kum nawe.”

-UMary Oliver, "Ndiza Ekhaya"

4. Phambi kwesigwebo sika-2015 SCOTUS, isigwebo seNkundla ePhakamileyo yaseMassachusetts esenza ukuba urhulumente abe ngowokuqala ukuqaphela ngokusemthethweni umtshato wesini esifanayo wawuyeyona nto ifundwayo ngexesha. umtshato wesini imisitho. Isephezulu kuluhlu lokufunda, ngakumbi kwizibini ezithanda ukuqaqambisa imbali yolingano kumsitho wazo.

“Umtshato liziko loluntu elibalulekileyo. Ukuzinikela okukodwa kwabantu ababini omnye komnye kukhulisa uthando nenkxaso; kuzisa uzinzo kuluntu lwethu. Kwabo bakhetha ukutshata, nakubantwana babo, umtshato ubonelela ngentabalala yeengenelo ezingokomthetho, zemali nezentlalo. Imbuyekezo ibeka izibophelelo ezinzima ezingokomthetho, zemali, nezentlalo….Ngaphandle kwamathandabuzo, umtshato waseburhulumenteni womeleza 'intlalontle yoluntu.' 'Liziko lentlalontle elibaluleke kakhulu...

Kwakhona umtshato uzisa iingenelo ezinkulu zangasese nezentlalo kwabo bakhetha ukutshata. Umtshato waseburhulumenteni kukuzibophelela ngokunzulu komnye umntu kunye nombhiyozo wasesidlangalaleni weenjongo zokuvalelana, ubuqabane, ukusondelelana, ukuthembeka, kunye nosapho…. Ngenxa yokuba uzalisekisa iminqweno yonqabiseko, indawo ekhuselekileyo, nonxibelelwano olubonakalisa ubuntu bethu obufanayo, umtshato waseburhulumenteni lilungiselelo elihlonelwayo, yaye isigqibo sokuba ubani ufanele atshate okanye atshate nabani na sesinye sezenzo ezibalaseleyo zokuzimela geqe.”

-UJaji uMargaret Marshall, uGoodridge v. weSebe lezeMpilo yoLuntu

5. Ithatyathwe kwinoveli ye-YA edumileyo UVukani Wasendle, esi sicatshulwa sinokutolikwa njengokubhiyozelwa kwesazisi somntu ngamnye, kunye nohambo lokuba nguwe, kungakhathaliseki ukuba apho unokuba khona kwi-spectrum yesini-identity, kwaye ufumane loo mntu ukhethekileyo okuthandayo ukuba ube nguwe.

“Abantu bafana nezixeko: Sonke sineendledlana nezitiya nophahla olufihlakeleyo kunye neendawo apho kuhluma iintyatyambo phakathi kweentanda zendledlana, kodwa amaxesha amaninzi ekuphela kwento esibonisana ngayo kukukrotyiswa kweposikhadi yesibhakabhaka okanye isikwere esikhazimlisiweyo. Uthando lukuvumela ukuba ufumane ezo ndawo zifihliweyo komnye umntu, kwanabo bebengazazi ukuba zikhona, kwanabo bebengacinganga ukuzibiza ngokuba bahle ngokwabo.”

—UHilary T. Smith, UVukani Wasendle

6. Oku kufundwa kwincwadi yabantwana Umvundla weVelveteen ithandwa kakhulu phakathi kwezibini ze-LGBTQ, enkosi kwi-verbiage yayo engeyiyo yesini. Siyawuthanda umbono womntwana ofunda oku, ngokuchukumisa ngakumbi "awww."

“Yintoni iREAL?” wabuza uMvundla ngenye imini, bengqengqe ngecala kufuphi nefender, phambi kokuba uNanna eze kuqoqosha igumbi. "Ingaba ithetha ukuba nezinto ezingxolayo ngaphakathi kwakho kunye nesibambo esincamathelayo?"

“Inyani ayiyondlela wenziwe ngayo,” latsho iHashe loLusu. “Yinto eyenzekayo kuwe. Xa umntwana ekuthanda ixesha elide, ixesha elide, kungekuphela nje ukudlala nawe, kodwa Ukuthanda NGOKWENENE, ngoko uba ngumntu wokwenene.”

"Ingaba ibuhlungu?" wabuza uMvundla.

“Ngamanye amaxesha,” latsho iHoshe Lolusu, kuba lalisoloko linyanisekile. "Xa ungowenyani awukhathali ukwenzakaliswa."

“Ngaba yenzeka ngaxeshanye, njengokuqotywa,” wabuza, “okanye kancinci kancinci?”

“Akwenzeki ngaxeshanye,” latsho iHashe loLusu. “Uba. Kuthatha ixesha elide. Yiyo loo nto ingenzeki rhoqo kubantu abaqhekeza lula, okanye abanencam ezibukhali, okanye ekufuneka bagcinwe ngononophelo. Ngokubanzi, ngelixa ungowenyani, uninzi lweenwele zakho sele zithandwa, kwaye amehlo akho aphuma kwaye uyakhululeka kumalungu akho kwaye ubhinqe kakhulu. Kodwa ezi zinto azinamsebenzi kwaphela, kuba xa sele ungumntu wokwenene awukwazi ukuba mbi, ngaphandle kwabantu abangaqondiyo.”

— uMargery Williams, Umvundla weVelveteen

7. Kukho iingcaphuno ezininzi kunye nemibongo esinokuyitsala kwimbongi eyintsomi kunye nomlweli wamalungelo abantu abathandana nabasetyhini uMaya Angelou onokuziva esekhaya kumsitho, kodwa imixholo yobugorha nothando kwiprozi yakhe ethi “Touched by an Angel” mihle, kwaye ngokucacileyo, ukhetho lwezibini ze-LGBTQ. 

“Thina, asiqhelanga ukuba nesibindi

abagxothiweyo kulonwabo

uhlala ezibhijelene kumaqokobhe obulolo

lude uthando luphume kwitempile yayo engcwele ephezulu

kwaye iza emehlweni ethu

ukusikhulula ebomini.

Uthando luyafika

kwaye kuloliwe wayo kuza imincili

iinkumbulo zakudala zolonwabo

iimbali zakudala zentlungu.

Ukuba sithe nesibindi,

uthando luwaqhawula amatyathanga okunkwantya

kwimiphefumlo yethu.

Silunyulwe kukoyika

Kukukhanya kothando

sinesibindi sokukhalipha

Kwaye ngokukhawuleza sibona

olothando luxabisa konke esikuko

kwaye iya kuhlala ikhona.

Ukanti luthando kuphela

nto leyo esikhululayo.”

—Maya Angelou, “Wachukunyiswa yingelosi”

UBrittny Drye ngumseki kunye nomhleli oyintloko we Uthando Inc., iblogi yomtshato elinganayo ebhiyozela uthando oluthe tye kunye nesini esifanayo, ngokulinganayo.